Encouragement for weary moms of the strong willed

After having my first two children I thought I had encountered everything. Then along came Emma. My oldest describes her like this. "Emma is like a cat. She does what she wants to, when she want to, and you can't make her do anything she has decided she doesn't want to do." While my oldest is emotional and my second is stubborn my youngest has them all beat in persistence and tenacity. Her theme song in life goes "Anything you can do I can do better." If there is conflict in the house rest assured Emma is somewhere in the midst of it.
Recently, I was given a book entitled Aaron's Way by Kendra Smiley, and her, now grown strong willed, son Aaron. This book filled my battle worn heart with some rays of hope. Here are some things I am discovering
1. A STRONG WILLED CHILD WANT TO BE IN CONTROL OF HIS OR HER ENVIROMENT.
Kendra Smally writes,

"A strong willed child appears confident. A strong willed child can appear both charming and defiant. He is very persistent and is even willing to take punishment to win. A strong willed child is generally gifted in manipulation. In fact, he is willing to cause emotional upset if it is a means to gain control of his life. A strong willed child does not necessarily want to control everyone else; he simply does not want to be controlled. Yet,he will strive to control someone threatening to control him"

2. STICK TO YOUR GUNS. DON'T GIVE UP AND DON'T GIVE IN.
"

"the strong willed child wants to control himself yet wants to be controlled by his loving parent and responsible adults."

Your strong willed child can make you very angry. In fact,the chances are great that he will make you angry. Why?It is because the antics of the strong willed child are capable of embarrassing you as a parent. they confirm in the minds of others your inability to be the perfect parent."

I laughed when I read this because this is so true. Your child God given personality is not the problem. If you lack the persistence to win the battle that is the the factor.
3.The flip side to the negative side of the driven persistence of a strong willed child is that when encourage and rewarded they can strive hard and be very successful at what they set about to accomplish.

""strong willed children are born Leaders. That is not the issue. The question is which group will they lead?

"because of their ability to solve,(as well as create) problems, it is wise to give a strong will child responsibility that is age appropriate. By giving him a worthwhile task to do, it builds up his sense of worth and allows him to develop credibility in his own mind. putting trust in your strong willed child to do the job assigned him validates his abilities and illustrates your confidence in him"

I highly recommend this book to the battle worn and weary mothers striving to raise their strong willed children to be kind, God fearing people without squelching the life inside them. It encouraged me tremendously.
Any of you have strong willed children out there? Please tell me I am not alone:)